Danger...Durian fruit is available here!

I love fruit and I must say that I have been introduced to many new and delicious treats here in Vietnam. There are, of course, the normal staples: pineapples, dragon fruit, kiwi, grapes, passion fruit, bananas, etc and then there are the new fruit: rambutan (sp?), long long (?), to name a few. There is one fruit that I decidedly do not enjoy though and it is the Durian. I had never heard of Durian before I got to Vietnam and I think that my innocence was a blessing (see:mooncakes).

A durian is a fruit that looks like a porcupine, all covered in spiky projections and smells like Toronto during a garbage strike. I think that should probably be enough to discourage any sane person from eating it because clearly it should not be eaten. But it is a 'tasty treat' here so I decided that I would attempt to eat it (clearly I am insane).

It is rather challenging to open, you need to look for its weak spot - another red flag that you should not attempt to eat it (note to self, if you need to find it's weak spot do not eat it). Anyway, the weak spot is usually a line down one side where the spikes meet and if you carefully cut into it . . . which is not easy due to the spikes and the fruits thick skin and the horrendous stench...you should be able to pierce the skin. Then you need to pry it open and unearth the sac like pods. Did I mention that it smells like a restaurant dumpster on a hot summer day? Anyway, the sac like pods look like giant, yellow, naked mole rat fetuses...Why do I feel the need to eat this again?...

Krista and I purchased a durian at the local grocery store and brought it home to the apartment. We quickly decided to keep it out on the balcony - it smelled worse than I imagined but I felt up for the challenge. I set out to cut the sucker open and it was no easy feat...it kind of smelled like feet...I finally got it open and was almost alarmed at how much it looked like an unborn rodent. I had come this far though so I decided to follow through. I unearthed one of the pods and tasted the slimy fruit. I was no longer breathing through my nose because the smell was so disgusting. I think that is what saved me because it actually tasted okay...I wouldn't say it was fantastic but it was nothing near what the smell would have suggested. It was all fine until I breathed in through my nose. I was overcome with the most horrible aftertaste. Think fermented shrimp meets rotten fruit. I knew I had made a mistake. I ran for my toothbrush and I couldn't brush enough. It was a brush fest. I am lucky that I have a taste bud left on my tongue. (Krista actually gagged and spit her durian out - so I know that I am not a wimp, it is just a disgusting fruit that should not be eaten).

I now have three things on my list: fermented shrimp, moon cakes and durian. I have heard that durian flavored things are quite good but my taste aversion will not allow me to try anything related to a durian yet. Maybe next year.

Anyway, now when I go to the grocery store I can smell the durian and it kind of makes me feel sick. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to try it after all. I also hear it is against the law to eat durian in public places in some countries...I now know why.